People taking you too literally

So I've got what I'm going to call a flexible relationship with the truth, which sounds worse than it is really. I'm by no means a compulsive liar, which also sounds pretty terrible... But I do tend to speak in hyperbole, am completely willing to make assumptions and educated guesses to answer people's questions, and will on occasion toss out throw-away lines that are just patently not true, but mostly when I assume that whoever I'm talking to knows that I'm being needlessly facetious. So for example, don't be surprised if you ask me to pass the salt and I say "God no" then pass you the salt. It's like a brain fart, I have no idea why I do it, but it's something that I do fairly regularly. On occasion though, I forget that people don't know I do this, which I imagine is very confusing for them.

But the real crux of this is probably my dad, who really just doesn't seem to get my throwawy lines sometimes. My two favorite related stories came after he asked me what I wanted:

for Christmas - "a platypus"
which lead to this Christmas morning (liberally paraphrased):
Dad - I'm sorry Dai that I couldn't find that game you wanted. I went to all the stores and none of them had it in stock
Me - What game?
Dad - "A Platypus", is it for Xbox? because no one had it or even seemed to know what I was talking about.
Me - ...

to be when I grow up - "a rock superstar, live large, big house, five cars, be in charge"
which lead to my birthday when he gave me a guitar(again probably even more liberally paraphrased... I mean come on I did start off this post saying I'm a liar):
Dad - So you want to be a rockstar. You should get to practicing
Me - ...